Friday, November 07, 2008

So Close

I have quite a bit to report on (Halloween, the breakup of the commune, the great college touring road trip) but not today. I am in a bit of a hurry because we are leaving on the aforementioned road trip in about 3 hours and as usual, I am running behind.

But I wanted to drop a quick line about the recent elections. It is interesting to me that in one election we show how far we have come as a nation, where we are able to judge other people by the content of their character and not the color of their skin (hmmmm where have we heard that before?) but in the same election, we show how far we have yet to go. I was hoping that Prop 8 in California (and other similar ballot items in other states) would be defeated but I was disappointed. It saddens me that in this day and age, after all we have been through as a nation and the crises we are in the midst of currently, we still have the energy to discriminate so blatantly. I was hopeful that I would see this end in my life time but I am beginning to lose faith in my fellow human beings. I am not quite sure they are smart enough, kind enough, Christian enough to do the right thing.

In Europe and many other countries, the government has gotten out of the "marriage" business. Every person , regardless of skin color, religious affiliation, social status, sexual orientation, goes to the local government agency and "registers" their union or their partnership. After a few words by the local government official (like a justice of the peace) in charge in the jurisdiction, the couple is considered legally "hitched". If after this exercise, the couple wishes a religious ceremony of some kind they go to their church, synagogue or temple, and have another ceremony. It would be up to the religious group to decide if the couple met whatever criteria the group has set up in order to sanctify or bless the relationship. The end.

I don't understand why we don't do something like this in the United States. We profess to be a country in which government and church are separate but that is not the case, in reality. Our government needs to get out of this issue. Don't get me wrong, I am a big fan of marriage. Been married for almost 25 years. My marriage is not threatened by 2 loving, committed, consenting adults who want to legalize their union. I have known gay couples who have been together for 30 or more years. They only want the same legal rights and benefits that I have. Straight people have had the institution for thousands of years, and we haven't done that well with it. What is the current statistic of marriages that end in divorce, 40% or so? We need gay people to help our numbers a bit. Marriage isn't threatened by gay people, we straight people are threatening it. As long as we continue to let stupid straight people get married as a "joke" (i.e. Britney Spears), get married and divorced within 4 months (Renee Zelleweger), have 107 day marriages (Lisa Marie Presley and Nicolas Cage), or a 9 day marriage (Cher & Greg Allman), apply for a marriage license while still married to your first wife (John McCain), I don't think we have any place to keep gay people from the tradition. In fact, given the mess we have made of the institution, I am surprised any self-respecting gay person would want to be affiliated with it.

I am convinced it will happen someday. And I hope when future generations look back on us, they aren't too embarrassed by our ignorance. I don't know though, I sure am.



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