VICTORIOUS!!!

See post here . Told ya! Details to follow after the holidays as I don't want to give away who might be getting these items.

Merry Christmas to All!!

Grocery Store Pet Peeves

Is it just me or is it something about the holiday season that just makes grocery shopping almost unbearable? Normally, I love shopping in all shapes or forms. It is in my genes - come from a long line of shoppers. It is part of my DNA profile. During the holiday season, I actually enjoy the gift shopping; don’t mind crowded malls. I take it as a challenge, a sport, competition. Getting the best deal gets my adrenaline pumping. If shopping were a sport, I am sure I could go pro or at least be in the elite category of amateur, like triple A or bowling or Nascar.

I think it is because at the holidays there are so many amateurs in the store, those who don’t know the in and outs, the etiquette. And maybe it is because I consider myself an expert in the field; I am annoyed by those that don’t follow the rules of grocery shopping. Oh and don’t kid yourself, there are rules. Let me give you a few. (And these are in no particular order because quite frankly they are all important).

1. Don’t park your cart on one side of the aisle and yourself on the other side. For example, if you are in the canned soup and vegetable aisle don’t park your cart on the soup side and then wander across to look at the canned veggies. What you have done, effectively, is block both sides of the aisle. People and carts can’t get around you. Cart management is very important in grocery shopping. Have a little self awareness, know where your fellow cart managers are, anticipate their movements, and get out of their way if you want to check the sodium content of every single can of chicken noodle in Safeway. Another tip, if your store has pillars in the most inconvenient places like mine, be aware of where you stop your cart. If you stop your cart right next to the pillar, guess what? No one can get around you. This also applies to the stores that display items in the aisles. Don't park your cart next to the display. It won't kill you to move ahead a few feet and go back to the item you want to look at or retrieve. Trust me.

2. If you bring your kids to the store with you and I recognize that there are situations where that needs to happen, keep them under control. Like automobiles, no one under 16 should be allowed to drive a cart. It is not adorable to have your 5 year old push your cart. In addition to the inevitable cart-run-into-your-heel-confrontation, I saw a 6 year old almost take out an entire display of Christmas M&Ms the other day at the store. I used to tell my kids on the very few grocery store trips they went on, that they couldn't be wider than the cart. So they had to either walk way in front of me and the cart or, preferably, behind me and the cart.

3. Express lanes are for those who can complete their transactions quickly. Repeat that out loud to yourself. If you haven’t used your debit card in the last 7 months and you just can’t remember your pin, you shouldn’t be in the express lane. If you want to discuss why (Insert Your Store’s Name Here) doesn’t carry your cat’s favorite brand of kitty litter, you shouldn't be in the express lane. If you are buying some exotic type of produce (yes I am talking to you radicchio buyers!) that the clerk just can’t remember the code for or can’t find the code for, you shouldn’t be in the express lane. And another thing express lane users, start your debit card or store card swiping as soon as the clerk has rung up the first item. There are few things in life more annoying than watching someone ring up an order in the express lane, THEN the customer searches her purse or goes through 27 cards in his wallet to find their store card or their credit card. Remember it is for those who can complete their transactions quickly. If you see yourself in any of those examples, the express lane is not for you. If you aren’t sure, message me your circumstances and I will be happy to let you know.

4. Regular lane users you have some rules too. (Please read express lane section about when to swipe your credit card or store card. It applies to you as well.) If you have brought your own bags to the store, don’t wait until the order has been bagged to present your reusable bags and ask that the order be re-bagged because you are a friend to the environment. If you can’t remember to present your bags before the bagger has started bagging, then you aren’t really very “green” to begin with and now the environment will just have to pay for your transgression. Think about that next time. If you really were concerned, you would make an effort to present your bags earlier in the process. Moving on. People that only have 1 or 2 or 3 items that stand behind big full carts in the regular lanes should not expect to skip ahead in line. 1 or 2 or 3 item people have whole lanes dedicated to them, the express lanes. My store has at least 5 and usually 3 of them are manned most of the time. If the express line is a little too long, you think you will move over to a regular line and someone will let you go head of them “because I only have one thing”. NOT IN MY LANE. I will wait you out. You can shift your weight from one ankle to another, try to make eye contact or sigh so deeply you begin to hyperventilate, I will not let you move head of me in line. It is the fairness of it all. Let’s face it, you are probably the same people who count items in the express lane and call out to the checker, “she has 13 items, only supposed to have 12”. We have our own lanes, let’s use them people.

5. Frozen food aisle. If you are looking at items in the frozen food case, don't hold the door open and peruse at your leisure. The glass doors get all fogged up and the next person can't see through them. Look through the glass, make your choice, THEN open the door to obtain your item or items. It goes without saying that you shouldn't leave the door open while you review the nutrition facts on the side. Close the door, review facts, put item in cart or back in case. Not rocket science.

6. People that eat from the bulk food bins. Do I really need to say this? I can almost excuse the kids, they don't know better. But it isn't usually the kids I see that stick their fingers inside and take a piece for snacking. Don't do this, no matter what!!! Unless you would like me to send Chizz or Snake over to put their grubby hands all over your food after they have been cleaning our gutters. Just saying. . . . It's gross and it's illegal. It is stealing, no ifs ands or buts. Frankly most produce departments (where these bins are usually located) will give you a taste of any item if you request it. If you take it, you are stealing. It is shop lifting except you aren't carrying the product out under your coat, you are taking it out in your stomach. And let's face it, someone always sees you do it. Be a better example. Shame, shame, shame.

So I think with these simple rules (Wendy's rules,if you insist), grocery store shopping can be a much better experience for everyone. Do you think I should print this out a few hundred times and give one to anyone I see not following the rules? Maybe not. But shape up people, or I just might!!

Parents Weekend

Chizz and I recently participated in a time-honored ritual - parents weekend. For those of you not in the know, its where parents of college students visit their children at college and get an idea of what the kid's life is like now that they aren't living with you 24/7. My mom gave me some very good advice. She told me this is what she used to do. Instead of worrying about what evil influences Kiki might be exposed to and wondering where she is late on a Saturday night, I have to convince myself that she is always at the library - studying. Hmmm. I think I can do that. Maybe. Actually, I think I like being a bit ignorant about what is going on at college in that way but those aren't the things you find out about at these Parents' Weekend events anyway, so off we went.


UCLA puts forth a good effort educating the parents on what programs are available to the kids, what it is like to live on campus, giving tours of campus (if you somehow managed to get through the application and acceptance process without going to one, I don't know how you did it. I think I have been on at least 6 campus tours of UCLA), eating in the dining hall, special lectures and parties where you can rub elbows with the chancellor and other important people. You can sign up for just about all of the events or pick and choose your way through. We signed up for a few but avoided anything that looked suspiciously like it would be a hold-up for money. I can't blame UC, all the campuses are looking for dough in this atmosphere but we already give UCLA $27,000+ a year. We don't have anymore money. They need to be talking to Snake! He has all the money in our family.

We also got to go to a football game. Auntie L & Auntie S, being alumni, are season ticket holders for football games so we were definitely interested in catching up with them at the game. Kiki is pledging a sorority. I am not going to say which one to keep her anonymous but let's just say one or more of the names includes the Greek letters, Gamma, Chi, Delta, Alpha, Phi, Rho, Kappa, Episilon, Pi, Iota, etc. So there were activities involved with that. Most of the sororities had a "Dad's day" where the dad got a t-shirt. We went on a tour of the sorority house (where Kiki may live next year) and then to the football game. It was fun. We sat with Auntie L, Uncle S and Dew. The next day there was a ceremony at the sorority house, where the new members are presented to the rest of the members and their parents. Kiki needed a white dress. I think finding a white dress in fall was harder than getting her accepted to the college to begin with!!

It was a very nice time and now when I speak with Kiki on the phone about this person or that building, I can use my imagination to picture what she is talking about. The trick is turning off your imagination so you don't see what she is NOT talking about!! Library, Library, Library, Library.

I am a Subscriber, hear me ROAR!!

The WTF household is a two paper household. We receive our local newspaper and also the San Francisco paper. We like getting two papers for a number of reasons. First, they fulfill two entirely separate needs. The local paper lets us know what is going on in our county, the happenings in our more immediate part of the globe. The SF Chronicle keeps us up to date on the news on a more national scale. Our ritual in the morning has been Chizz reads the local paper at breakfast and I read the SF Chronicle. He leaves for work and takes the Chronicle with him and I read the local paper at a more convenient time during the day sometime after he leaves. It works for us.

Until about 2 weeks ago. I received our renewal bill for the Chronicle. $403 per year. Last year I paid $140. It is now almost triple. I understand the siege newspapers are under right now trying to stay afloat and relevant in this economy, but I can't single handedly bring them back. When I sat down and figured it out, it doesn't make economical sense to subscribe to the paper at this rate. You receive very, very little benefit. The newspaper stand price (what it would cost if I bought it at Safeway) for a full year of the SF Chronicle is $417.00. When we subscribed to the paper, I usually didn't read the Saturday's paper - too little content. Very often when we went on vacation, I donated the papers. Count vacation papers at 15 per year, and 52 Saturday papers, the newstand price of my paper goes down to $350. Even if Chizz bought the Chronicle at Bart every single weekday he commutes into the city, we would still save money not subscribing.

So I cancelled our subscription. And I made sure the Chronicle knew why. And apparently they don't care, at least when I called in they did nothing to try and retain me as a customer. Based on some discussions I have had with my friends and family, I think the SF Chronicle is losing lots of customers with this approach. I would not be surprised if they aren't around much longer. I worry about the state of all newspapers. I love sitting down and reading one, but I think I am in the last generation that really does that. The younger generation gets their news from the Internet or television. Nothing wrong with that, it is just a different medium. Quite frankly, the newspaper industry doesn't appear to be doing anything to lure younger readers. They certainly don't do anything to keep their current ones. It is a shame.

Don't worry, we still subscribe to 2 newspapers, our local paper and ta-da . . . . the Wall Street Journal! (And which we receive for the bargain price of $150 per year). Sorry Chronicle, but by the time you do get around to offering me a discount to come back, I most likely can't or won't be persuaded to come back. The only downside, I don't have 2 Sudokus to do every morning. Oh, well I'll survive!! (Probably more than the Chronicle can say!)

Do You Zhu Zhu?

The call has been put out. Someone in my circle of family and friends wants, wait should I say, needs a Zhu Zhu pet. In case you don't have a person under 10 years old in your life, Zhu Zhu pets are this years "it" toy. You know, this year's Tickle-Me-Elmo, Wii, Princess Unicorn or Cabbage Patch Kid (okay I am dating myself here). Every year there is always a toy that is impossible to get, yet somehow it ends up on every kid's list. And parents go nuts trying to find that toy, paying 2, 3 even 10 times the value to get the item for their precious to open on Christmas Day.

Oh I mock because I have been there. One Christmas when Snake was 4 years old, all he wanted for Christmas was "Black Buzz". It was a special edition Buzz Lightyear Figure, that wasn't really black, it was silverish, kind of a plastic shiny chrome color but that is what he called it. He saw one in the Disney store and it was all he talked about. So of course, by the time I got to the Disney store to buy it , they were out of stock. It was hard to find. So I put the call out to the network of sisters, aunties and grandmas. And California was searched up and down the coast for a "Black Buzz". It was searched and it was searched hard. I tried to manage Snake's expectations. "You know sometimes you don't get everything you want for Christmas, but there is always your birthday just a little over 2 months away", in my cheerful it-doesn't-really-matter-if-all-of-your-Christmas-dreams-are-dashed, right? mom voice. I started to panic but Snake never did. He kept telling me "don't worry, Santa will bring it". Oh right, I forgot.

So I have been searching for Zhu Zhu pets. I have searched every store in about a 15 mile radius from my house looking for the toys. I can tell I am not the only one. The store clerks are just a little snippy. "Do you have---", I don't even get a chance to finish my question before several of them have cut me off "No. We don't have any Zhu Zhu pets. No. We don't know when we will get any in. No. We don't have any idea of when any kind of toy shipment will come in." (Apparently these boxes just appear like magic in stock rooms everywhere.) So I have taken to having them show me where the Zhu Zhu's will be, if and when they are ever in stock. So I know where to look without disturbing the toy department clerks who are too busy and important to answer my questions about . . . toys. And when I find them, because I have every confidence I will, I will buy as many as I can. And distribute them to my family and friends who need them. At cost. Because I understand.

Oh and yes, Snake did get the Black Buzz for Christmas. It was found about 2 days before and made its appearance under our tree on Christmas morning. Snake just said "See, I knew Santa would find it" and he was right. Then Kiki dropped it about two minutes after he opened it and his little shiny chrome foot broke off. We spent Christmas morning buying Scotch tape at Walgreens to tape Buzz's foot back on. And to all a good night!!

Nooooooooo! Say it Ain't So, Joe!!!!!!!

For the past few months, I have been missing something at my Trader Joe's store. I have checked for it over and over again, and it hasn't been in the freezer section. For a few weeks the sign was still there, so I thought perhaps there was a run on this product and eventually it would be back. But then, the sign disappeared. It wasn't there any more and I started to lose hope that the product would be restocked. So today I asked about it. (I hadn't asked before because until I got an answer one way or another, I could still pretend that the inevitable might not happen.) It was not good news. Trader Joe's will not be restocking the Cranberry Oatmeal frozen cookie dough. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I loved the Cranberry Oatmeal cookie dough. Every store has chocolate chip dough or sugar cookie dough. Those flavors are common and pedestrian. But only Trader Joe's had cranberry oatmeal. Every adult that I made those cookies for, loved them. They were easy, just pop them out of the freezer onto a cookie sheet and 12-15 minutes later - viola! Yummy cookies.

So I emailed Trader Joe's and asked them nicely (I said please) to bring back the cookie dough. If not permanently, just until I can corner the market on the cookies and stock my freezer. You can email them too, here. Please. I asked nicely.

Mind if we watch while you spawn?

Chizz has been wanting to go up to Lake Tahoe and see the salmon spawn at Taylor Creek. A friend of his from work went a week before and had some amazing photos. We decided to take a drive up for the day. Snake needed freeway driving experience and we wanted to see the salmon spawn, so we figured we could get two proverbial birds with one big car shaped stone.



Taylor Creek is off the south shore of Tahoe. We don't often get to the south shore, we are more north shore folks. Each autumn, mature Kokanee salmon return to the streams where they hatched to get a mate, spawn and die. Wow!! And each year we humans come to watch. Not much privacy. It was a beautiful day in California. We had some pretty significant rain the week or so before, so we were happy to see blue skies and it was only a bit nippy. We really didn't need sweatshirts or jackets. We probably missed the optimum day for viewing by a week or so, but it was still pretty good and far as really getting to see a number of salmon up close and personal. The salmon go through some pretty amazing physical changes not the least of which is changing from their silvery kind of color to a brilliant bright red. When you walk along the creek, you just see all kinds of fish kind of swimming in place looking for a good place to lay and fertilize their eggs. Also there? The ducks - ready to eat freshly laid eggs and/or fish. They weren't really picky. The ducks did this amazing thing where they kind of scooted along the water really fast and chased the fish. I am not sure if they were trying to catch them, and I never really saw any duck catch a fish or if they were trying to stir up the bottom of the creek where the eggs were just laid to try and eat the eggs. But there was quite a bit of scooting going on.

Even though we were a few days past the prime viewing time. There were still quite a few people there that day. I am not sure if it was the beautiful weather that brought them out or the chance to see the salmon spawning. But I was amazed at the crowd. Most of the people were respectful of the process, the viewing of the circle of life so to speak. But there are always a few that let their kids try and touch or catch the fish for the cute photo op. I wondered how the parents would have liked it if someone was yanking on their fins while they were conceiving their little miracle, or, more morbidly, meeting their maker. Some people just seem to believe that everything is put on earth for their amusement, to do with as they please. No wonder our society grows up with such entitlement!

I will say US Forest Service does quite a good job of explaining what is happening. There were various signs around, explaining the differences the male and female fish go through physically, what each of their roles were, how many made it through(3 eggs from every 1000 laid will survive). You can walk down the path and see the various spots that a salmon might choose to spawn. There is an underground cutout you can go through and it explains the different terrain and animals that live nearby and how that effects the salmon process. At one point we walked over a bridge and we could look down on all the various salmon in the creek bed. This is a photo of Chizz and Snakes' shadows. I thought it was cool. I am easily amused.



The aspen trees are beautiful this time of year and accompanied by the gorgeous weather, one appreciates living in such a beautiful place.

Boys - 2, Girl - 1 : (

I am interrupting our Asian travelogue to bring a very important post, at least it is very important to me. We had an exciting event in our household a few weeks ago, we dropped Kiki off at college. I think I am safe to mention her school (UCLA) for a few reasons (1) she is one of 4500+ freshman arriving this fall and (2) "Kiki" is not her real name so her anonymity is probably pretty safe.

Her scheduled move in time was between 12 - 1 on a Saturday. Our trip down to LA was a very circuitous route. Chizz was on his annual "golf" trip with his college buddies in Yosemite. We couldn't fly because there was just so much stuff to bring, comforter, hair dryer, ironing board, iron, towels, sheets, etc. It would have cost us $200 in extra bag fees!! So we needed to drive. In order that we not have 2 cars in LA, which would also mean we would drive back separately for 6 hours, Kiki & I drove to Yosemite first and picked up Chizz. We then drove another 1 1/2 hours back to Fresno, got a hotel room and woke up pretty early on Saturday morning to drive the remaining 4 hours to UCLA.

As we got closer to the campus, the excitement level in the car started to amp up. UCLA really makes a big production of the process, which I think helps the kids feel really welcome. When we drove up to the designated building, there were students all wearing the same t-shirts, applauding, doing the 8 clap, cheering the kids and screaming "Welcome to UCLA". It was intimidating and welcoming at the same time, if you can imagine it. The parking lot is controlled pandemonium. Cars all over the place, students directing traffic, people walking in between cars with boxes, fridges, microwaves, suitcases. Once you park your car, you check out these huge bins. I thought Kiki brought alot of stuff. It filled up the trunk of our car, 2/3 of the back seat and even still Chizz had a few things perched precariously on his lap. Actually she did pretty well. We took 1 1/2 bins of belongs up to the dorm room. I saw one girl take 4 bins loads of things. During parent orientation, UCLA staff warned parents that most of the kids would be living triple in a room originally meant as a double. Translation: There is no room for "extra" anything. Very explicitly, one of the orientation staff told us, don't bring furniture, don't bring big lamps, don't bring stand alone microwaves (although we saw plenty of those being traipsed upstairs) and if you even dare to bring a U-Haul, they would literally turn you away. (Sidenote: Kiki is lucky that she is going to UCLA where the weather is fairly mild all year long. Winter gear here will probably consist of a long sleeve t-shirt AND a sweatshirt, and perhaps covered shoes. Other than that, it is strictly flip flops, shorts and spaghetti strap shirts. Since she will be coming home for Thankgsiving, she can switch out her "summer" gear for more appropriate winter togs.)

We met her roommates. Both are from local towns not far away and both seem very nice. Kiki seems a bit more, how should I say this politely, ummmm "boisterous" (read : LOUD) than her roommates. So far, she says, it looks like this roommate situation is going to work out just fine. The first week has been a variety of "get-to-know-you" activities with the dorm and floor mates, concerts (with performers I had never heard of but Kiki was quite excited about them) and finding their way around Westwood.

She seems to be loving it. Her college life so far seems to be full of parties, dinners, game nights etc. I think she has mentioned going to a class or two and there might even be a bit of studying going on but I am not sure.

It has been an adjustment for me. Kiki fills up a room or a house when she is in it. She constantly has music or the tv going or sometimes "her talkers" as her little cousin likes to say. Not that Snake doesn't make his presence known, it is just in a different, more quiet way. She and I did a lot together, more than I think we really realized. She was always up for a Target run, or a browse through the mall, an occasional movie. We had a lot of the same "guilty pleasure" tv shows in common, Biggest Loser, Drop Dead Diva, Hell's Kitchen, Gossip Girl. I miss those nights where we would sit together in the family room and laugh or be shocked at something mean that happened on Biggest Loser or see how many times Gordon Ramsay would throw the risotto on the floor.

My whole life has been surrounded by girls. I come from a family of 5 daughters. On my side of the family, the girls outnumber the boys by a ratio of 2 - 1. On Chizz's side, it is completely different, 6 boys 2 girls. But I have never in my entire life lived in a situation, until now, where testosterone outweighs the estrogen. (Let's face, even when it is even 2 girls, 2 boys, it is never really even!) So these past few weeks have taken some adjustment. Let me say the boys in my family are really enjoying the shift in the balance of power. There seems to be more football and baseball on the TV, more wrestling and rough housing, more "gross" jokes. It is like the inmates are running the asylum. People tell me it is going to be an adjustment, but I think I just need to take more control. Only time will tell!!

And tomorrow, she turns 18. Very symbolic in a way. Her first birthday away from the family is the birthday where she becomes a legal adult. Part of me is sad that we can't be with her on her birthday. But mostly I know that she is where she is supposed to be. As Chizz pointed out on the long ride home back to Northern California, this is the goal. This is what we were supposed to do. We raised a smart, funny, beautiful girl. She is going to be great. This is the end of her childhood but the beginning of her life.

Now we just have to convince her mom!!

Koh Samui

Some of the most beautiful beaches in the world are in Thailand. We knew that we wanted to include a Thai beach during our trip, we were just concerned that because we were going during the summer months we might encounter some rough weather. Not just rain but it can get fairly windy and if the water and tides were too rough, we wouldn't be able to go in the water, snorkel or even take a boat trip. We had read about lots of trips that are canceled during the summer because of rough weather or seas. Probably one of the most famous beaches is in Phuket. But Phuket being located on the coast is very susceptible to bad weather. So after a bit of research we decided to go to Koh Samui . Koh means island in Thai. It is in the Gulf of Thailand and a bit more sheltered. We could possibly encounter rain and wind but if there was a chance we wouldn't, it would be here.

We had an interesting flight to Koh Samui on Bangkok Airways. It was the first time the kids had ever been on a plane with a propeller. They were a little taken aback. Kiki & I were sitting next to each other on the plane. Right after they started the engine, I asked her if she had seen the guy go out there and start the propeller with his hand? It took her a moment before she realized I was kidding. Even though the plane was pretty small, it was an uneventful hour long flight. An hour long flight that included a meal. . . wait - don't get me started on those airlines again.

Samui is beautiful. As a family, we really love beautiful beaches, decent hotel rooms and great restaurants that are within walking distance of our hotel. Samui had all of those. Our hotel was really nice, the pool area was great with little cabanas available for those who needed some relief from the 100+ degree temps or didn't necessarily want worry about sand everywhere. I loved these little elephants at the pool that shot water all day long. When we weren't at the pool we spent time at the beach. The beach is where it is at in Thailand. You can lay there and soak up the rays, drink fancy "umbrella" drinks from the bar, people and shop!! Perfect day. You don't even have to go to the stores, the vendors come right to you. Dresses, t-shirts, massages, jewelry. What's not to love. This is the view from the chaise lounge. One of the nicer things about traveling with teenagers (and quite frankly, one of the annoying things) is that they have in their mind what they would like to do and sometimes that doesn't coordinate with what you want to do. Chizz and I were really up for a snorkle trip, but Kiki & Snake were not feeling it. Kiki wanted more sun time and she has never been wild about snorkeling and Snake was a bit concerned about jelly fish. So Chizz and I went to Koh Tao, a short 1 1/2 hour boat trip away. We left them at the hotel with strict orders about how much they could order on their room tab. They are actually pretty responsible and we have never had a problem with that, which makes me proud. It was kind of nice. Since our nest is close to emptying soon, we are envisioning what our life will be like in a few years without the kids. If we use this trip as a guide, it will include daiquiris, snorkeling, beer and boat trips! Sign me up. Here are some photos from our trip.







So Koh Samui certainly hit the "beach" spot. That isn't to say we didn't have a spot of rain here and there. Like most tropical locations, Koh Samui can have short, incredibly powerful rain showers for about 45 minutes or so. Then it clears up and it is absolutely beautiful. The rain also cools it down a bit. We can heartily recommend Koh Samui. Next stop, Cambodia!!

Five Nights in Bangkok (and the World's Our Oyster)

Bangkok was the first stop on our Asia trip, and our third and our fifth! We stayed a few days and then used Bangkok as our base when we went on some other trips. What makes Bangkok interesting is that it is both a big city and small village at the same time, a paradox of sorts. There are many different angles to this city and we got to see just about all of them. This photo represents some of the different sides of Bangkok, where we see a religious building in the center, in the forefront a small river house, and in the background a more modern office building. Multi-dimensional.

Whenever we have travel involving crossing more time zones than you can keep track of, we like to try and emerge ourselves in whatever time zone we are in at the moment. So that meant the minute we got to our hotel, we dropped our bags and went right out to explore the city. Bangkok is built on a river, the Chao Phraya and there are many canals that branch off it. We decided that we would take a boat tour down the river and through the canals, sort of an overview. It was a great introduction to the city, the culture and some of the things we had in store for us over the next few days.











The next morning we went over to the Grand Palace complex. In addition to the palace itself, there is quite a bit to look at in the complex, many statues, buildings - all incredibly ornate. The Palace isn't used as a royal residence any longer but quite a few of
the ceremonial events and royal rituals (coronations, weddings, funerals etc.) are still held here. And as with any palace, no matter how ceremonial, there are guards to make sure that everyone stays where they are supposed to and doesn't touch anything they aren't supposed to. Apparently these guards are ceremonial too, as we noticed there was no ammunition clip in the gun. I guess they don't expect any trouble!!

The palace grounds are full of statuary, each more interesting than the next. Looking at some of the statues I think I see an inspiration for some Disney characters. Don't some of these guys look Disneyesque?






Also on the temple grounds is the Wat Pra Kaew. Basically, a wat is a monastery temple complex in Thailand, Cambodia or Laos. In its strictest definition a complex can only be called a wat if it has a minimum of 3 resident monks. No trio of monks, no wat. However, over the years the term has been used to generically describe just about any temple in these countries, sometimes even temple ruins in which obviously no one lives. We saw many, many, many wats (both real and faux) in our almost 3 weeks here. Much like churches and temples, I am fascinated by them. This particular wat housed a very famous Buddha statue, the Emerald Buddha, thought to be nearly over 2000 years old. There are very strict rules when visiting a wat; usually no speaking, no shoes, you are not supposed to stand in the presence of the Buddha, you can either sit or kneel and when you are sitting or kneeling, the heels of your feet cannot face the Buddha. It is considered a huge insult to show the bottom of your feet. It is really tricky to sit down "Indian style" or crossed leg and not point one of your feet to the Buddha. You have to be pretty aware. This particular wat did not allow photography inside so I had to take the photo outside of the temple doors, which explains the fuzzy focus. It is interesting to remember that while many of us are sightseeing and touring, these are still active places of worship for many local citizens. We came across quite a few people praying and making offerings to the Buddha. It is important to maintain a respectful distance while people are worshipping in the place we are traipsing through.

Pretty much right next door to the palace complex is Wat Pho. It is one of the oldest wats in Thailand and houses the very famous (and very large) Reclining Buddha. Wat Pho is also the original birthplace of Thai massage and even before its founding in 1788, it was center for Thai medicine. You can still see some tablets on the walls that depict different muscles and bones in the human body. The reclining Buddha itself is pretty amazing. It is about 150 ft long, approximately half a football field long.a The bottoms of its feet are inlaid with mother of pearl.

Bangkok is a city struggling with its image. It has so many incredible historic and religious sites yet it is quite well known for it's tawdry side. In the evening we went by several bars that seemed only to have Western men as their clientele, apparently waiting for special "company". We often saw much older, less attractive men with very, very (very) young beautiful women. Chizz and I had quite a few discussions on whether these were two adults indulging in consenting behaviours or examples of desperate people being taken advantage of, on both sides. We never solved it. One evening, late, we were walking back to our hotel(remember,every vacation with Chizz contains at least one leg numbing walk or most likely several) and we walked past a bus stop. Snake pointed out that there seemed to be quite a few people waiting for the bus that evening. When we looked over, we saw probably about 20 mostly young women, in very short skirts and even higher heels. They could have been waiting for a bus, but I don't think so.

One evening we went to Cabbages & Condoms, a local restaurant in Bangkok. It is owned by the former minister of health in Thailand. A percentage of the profits are given to a non-profit organization that promotes birth control, aids awareness, rural development, and environmental conservation. While I think the food is passable, it's decent,not knock your socks gourmet, but good, you don't really go there for the food you go there for the other stuff. Such as "condom man", this man in a suit made of condoms! I am not sure what his super powers are, or at least I don't want to think about it.



They even used condoms in decoration, like this tabletop.


Or this lamp.


They also give out lots of free condoms. In very inventive ways.





If you have older kids, it is definitely worth a trip. If you have younger kids, unless you want to explain LOTS of things, you might want to save it for another time.

All in all, we enjoyed Bangkok and learned something from all of its various aspects. Next stop! Island hopping!!

Asia, Part One!

I have been dithering in my mind the best way to go about documenting our Asian Adventures in a logical fashion, when the trip itself was a bit scattered. When you travel on frequent flyer miles (thank you very much Chizz and Chizz's company) you fit your travel ideas into the limited frequent flyer allotted seats on each flight. So when we booked our main tickets to Bangkok and Hong Kong so many, many months ago, we hadn't really fleshed out our entire trip. We knew we wanted to go to a beach in Thailand, we weren't sure which one. We wanted to try and fit in a trip to Cambodia but we were uncertain whether to fly or go by some other method or really whether it was safe because of rising tensions between Thailand and Cambodia (it was). We ended up using Bangkok as our base and we went back and forth from there. Bangkok to Koh Samui (the beach) back to Bangkok. A few days more in Bangkok, then Bangkok to Cambodia back to Bangkok again. We wanted to go to Hong Kong, we knew, but ended up staying a bit longer because of the frequent flyer situation. So rather than tell a completely chronological story, I think I will break it down a bit by location.

But before I do that, let me tell you a bit about the actual travel. As I mentioned, Chizz had a gazillion frequent flyer miles. When we were booking the trip, we tried to do the whole thing business class but at that time the airline would only allow 2 FF mile seats awarded in business class per flight. So although we had enough miles and the seats were available, we had a quandary because there were 4 of us flying. I have loads of friends that routinely travel in business class and put their kids in coach. I just couldn't do that, Chizz was silent on the matter, so we all flew coach. It took us about an hour to book it over the phone. We booked on the phone because we had multiple locations and it was fairly complicated. When we finished, we ended up with a route that looked like this:

Leaving: We went from San Francisco to Singapore, 5 hour layover in Singapore and then Singapore to Bangkok, all on Singapore Airlines. Our trip from Bangkok to Hong Kong was on Thai Airways.

Returning: We went from Hong Kong to Vancouver on Air Canada (more about them later) and then from Vancouver to San Francisco on United.

In Between: We flew from Bangkok to Koh Samui and Cambodia both times on Bangkok Airways (more about them later but simply said my FAVORITE airline of the entire trip)

Okay, when we arrived at the airport in SF we found that our flight was actually going to make a short itsy, bitsy stop in Korea which we hadn't known about before. The kids were excited, hoping to get a Korea stamp in their passport (they didn't) but I was thinking that it would make the flight longer which is just what we needed since it was already about 30 hours of travel time. Actually it was just fine, we were just there long enough to get off the plane and stretch our legs, walk a bit and get right back on.

Let me say a thing or two or twenty seven about Asian Airlines in general. I think I am qualified now because I flew 3 different Asian airlines during this trip. They are flippin' phenomenal. You don't realize the difference in service between American based airlines and Asian based airlines until you have experienced it. And I am not talking about the ingratiating, over-the-top, somewhat annoying in your face kind of service. I am talking about genuinely nice flight attendants. The attitude was "I am glad-you-are-here-because-I-recognize-without-passengers-taking these-flights, I-wouldn't-have-a-job" kind of nice. I didn't see one attendant lose his or her cool during the entire 14 hour first leg of our trip. In fact I didn't see any attendant lose their cool or speak in any kind of a snippy tone until we were flying back. Every single flight we took on an Asian Airline served a meal of some kind and free drinks. Every single one, the 14 hour flight, the 5 hour flight, the 3 hour flights and the 4 slightly less than one hour flights we took. Some of the meals were more elaborate, some were sandwiches. But the point is every one of them served a meal, at no extra cost. And even though we didn't pay for the longer legs of our journey, we did pay for the shorter flights to Koh Samui and Cambodia. I know the price points, and they were right in line with what we pay in the US for short hops. In fact a few of them were cheaper.

This is the part whereI had inserted my rant on US airlines and unions and such but I have changed my mind about including it. I have already ranted so much about this in the past few weeks, that my kids start convulsing when they hear me go off. And I already bored just about every member of my family with this story one, two or maybe 16 times. So I am going to leave it alone. However - if you would like to hear it, give me a call I will be happy to go on, and on and on about it!!

When we were coming home, flying on Air Canada, I had a rude reminder that we weren't on an Asian airline anymore, Toto. It was about 2 hours before we were to land and the flight attendants were serving breakfast. I had noticed one woman sitting in front of me, kitty cornered. I noticed her because for a majority of the flight, she had her laptop out and was working on her photos of the trip and her photos were beautiful. I don't think she was a professional photographer but she was sorting them, deleting the duds, etc and I enjoyed watching the show. She had a set of headphones on that I have seen people wear before, the noise cancelling ones that have pretty big ear pieces. So the flight attendants were coming through and offering people their choice of eggs or congee. Congee is a sort of loose, milky, soup like rice porridge or cereal kind of thing. We saw it in just about every hotel we stayed at. Not my cup of tea but since this flight had about 90% Asians on it, quite a few of the passengers were making that choice. The photo woman didn't hear the flight attendant because of her head phones, so he tapped her on the shoulder and kind of gave her a "what do you want" look. The woman took off her head phones and said "excuse me?" and the flight attendant yelled "EGGS OR CONGEE, WHAT DO YOU WANT???" and I mean he yelled it at her, with such a nasty tone. She was embarrassed and I was embarrassed for her. The guy was a total jerk. Two rows up, one of the passengers asked what congee was. The same attendant said,very sarcastically, "some kind of Asian crap cereal" and rolled his eyes. All in full view. I was mortified. Even if this guy had had the worst possible day, it was no excuse for his attitude. I think it is very typical of the western flight attendant attitude: "You-are-so-lucky-I-am-here. It's-not-about-the-passenger,-if-you-are-lucky-I-might-allow-you-to-buy-a-$7-bottle-of-cheap-wine-from-me. But-only-one-don't-ask-for-another! " Or something like that.

Okay, that turned into a mini-rant - sorry. The flight over went pretty smoothly, although it was pretty long. I think the kids said we were traveling about 30 hours and that was about right. The toughest part was the Singapore layover. This is one of the nicest airports ever, it includes a swimming pool, about 50 restaurants, quite a few shops etc. We were there 5 hours, but it was from 2 am to 7 am so nothing was open. So close yet, so far. We did see the Butterfly Habitat, which we could walk through. I tried to take a photo but my lens fogged up. So we hunkered down in some pretty comfortable chairs next to the Koi pond. Easily the biggest Koi I have ever seen in my life. But I thought what was really funny was the sign next to the Koi pond, warning you in order (1) Don't try swimming with the Koi (2) Don't feed the Koi and (3) Don't try to catch or eat the Koi. Really? I can see that people might try and feed the koi but have they really had problems with people trying to swim or catch the Koi? Wow!

There was also free internet and terminals at the airport, so the kids and I surfed and sent emails while Chizz caught up on some sleep. At one point we were all kind of sleeping except for Kiki, who, which should be a surprise to no one who knows her, was still kind of playing around on the internet. The police approached her and she was ordered to show her passport, her ticket on the upcoming flight and the ticket for the flight we just took. Of course she had to come over to us, police in tow. They also checked our documents as well. It was interesting. Chizz thought they did this because the airport is open 24 hours and Singapore isn't too keen on vagrants sleeping in the airport. We noticed them asking for papers from everyone in the seating areas next to us as well, sometimes waking folks up to see their documents.

After 5 hours, we were on the plane to Bangkok. Uneventful flight. The nice thing about a 12 hour flight is that is makes 3-5 hour flights seem like a piece of cake. Which they are!

So next report, Bangkok!!

Home, Sort Of.

Okay, we made it home last night but we are wiped by the travel. Or at least Chizz & I are, old people have a harder time rebounding. So I will catch up the blog as soon as I download the photos and can stay up past 4:00 p.m. in the afternoon (OMG- Do you think I have crossed over to the "wake-up-at-4:45-a.m.-go-to-sleep-at-4:30-p.m." type of old person now that I have reached that birthday? Maybe I will never go back?? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!)

Anyhoo, here's a little commercial that we love in our family to amuse you until I get my act together. If I get my act together. . . . .

Wat You Said???

So sorry WTFers to be away from the blog for so very long. It has been so very crazy here. Kiki graduated from high school earlier this month and the hoopla surrounding that event has taken up just about every moment of my existence over the past few months! And besides that I haven't really had much to say. But feeling refreshed, I am going to try and comment more often, for my own sanity rather than anything else!

Right now, the WTF family is in Thailand. I may have hinted that this was a momentous year for us. The aforementioned graduation, the previously mentioned 25th wedding anniversary and the never to be mentioned again birthday I will be celebrating in a few weeks. So Chizz and I decided we should do something special. We cashed in quite a few of the frequent flyer miles and booked our trip. 30+ hours of flying later and we land in Bangkok. We had a few days to see some of the sites there when we moved on to Koh Sumai, a wonderful little island nearby. I will blog in detail later with pictures. So far my first impression, there are quite a few temples (wats) in Thailand. I have also discovered that in addition to my affinity for churches, which I dragged my family into every single one we came across in Europe, I kind of like wats as well. So we will be seing quite a few of those.

I promise to blog all about our trip when we return in about two weeks or so! Until then, hugs!

Wendy and Her Horrible, Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I had a very bad day today. Not anything particularly life threatening, but just a yucky day. I spent about two hours today with my phone company, trying to pay my bill. Shouldn't be that hard, right? After all I signed up right away for the paperless billing. Supposed to be easier and good for the environment as well. Every month, my phone company sends me an email telling me my bill is ready for payment. Usually I go to the website, put in my ID name and password in and my bill pops up on the screen. A quick click on the pay button and it is all done.

Except today. Couldn't get in the website. It didn't like my ID name or my password. Tried changing my password, that didn't work. Signed out of my browser, tried it all over again. Still wouldn't work. So I did what I thought I should, called the company. That is where the frustration set in. I explained my situation to the operator. She transferred me to the correct department. Not really. The department I got was in Texas and apparently since I am in California, the Texas folks can't log in to see my account. So she transferred me to the correct department. Not really, again. I got the internet department. My phone company also has internet service. So she transferred me to another department. Not really. Actually I think she just transferred me to the department again, her own department!!! But not knowing that again, I explained my problem. This operator seemed particularly focused on my email address, finally telling me that I couldn't do the online billing without an address from their company. What??!!?? I lost control and demanded to speak with a supervisor, who listened to my ranting for a few minutes. Then told me the best solution to my problem would be to go online and use their email system to email a request for help. Unbelievable. The long and short, but actually the long and very long, of my story is that I was transferred I think 8 times. I lost count. It was minimally 8 times, perhaps 9. I NEVER received a solution to my problem. I received another supervisor who told me he would check into and have someone call me tomorrow. By this time, I was pretty much beaten down so I agreed.

So, I am a little hesitant to mention the name of this company but it rhymes with AT&T (oops, sorry but not really). It is unbelievable to me that a company the size of AT&T couldn't handle this question. It seems really simple to me. I probably need to get my password or ID name re-set in some manner. But I couldn't get through the maze of AT&T bureaucracy to find that department. No one seemed to know where to send me, so they just sent me. I don't have any confidence I will get a call tomorrow so I think I will have to go at this again next week.

After all of this, I went to our local grocery store chain to pick up some stuff for dinner. I don't usually like going on this day because it is senior citizen day, all seniors get a 5% discount on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Those seniors really like their discounts so the store is usually much busier on that day. But I have to go because for some reason, my unreasonable kids like to eat EVERY day. I am kind of beat, watching the young 22-23ish checker check my items through. Then I notice it. He gave me the senior citizen discount!!! I am outraged! But you want to know the worst part? I didn't say a thing, I took it - the whole $1.87. I would like to think that I don't look quite senior citizenish yet but I believe that my experience with AT&T this afternoon aged me. I just hadn't realized how much!

Deja Vu All Over Again

Kiki left this morning for 5th grade camp. Wait, a minute - - what year is it? Isn't she going to college next fall (hopefully?)? Yes, yes she is but this week she is returning to her elementary school alma mater to serve as a camp counselor for 5th grade camp. All of the 5th graders in our town go away for 5 days to a camp where they learn all kinds of things about nature and science. Kiki and Snake both went when they were in 5th grade, what seems like a million years ago. Seniors in the local high school can apply to be counselors for the week. Ever since Kiki went in 5th grade, she said she wanted to be a counselor her senior year and luckily enough she was chosen. So I drove her to the school parking lot this morning to get on the big bus to the camp. The bus blocked me in, so I had plenty of time to ponder all that was going on around me.

It really seems like forever ago that Kiki & Snake went to camp. Neither one of my kids were big on sleep away camp when they were younger. They just weren't ready. Now, I think they would sleep away all the time - if allowed! You could tell the kids that were a little nervous, clinging to their parents, not really joining in, not getting on the bus until the teacher absolutely made them. But for the most part, these kids will love the experience. I think Kiki will be sensitive to those kids. I guess 10 times more girls volunteer to be counselors than boys, so the girls are asked if they would be willing to take a boys cabin. Kiki definitely said she would. She felt glad that her experience with Snake would finally pay off in something!! I did give her a little refresher course in 5th grade boys; preparing her that they most likely won't shower if given a chance; forewarning her to be on the lookout for when they when they antagonized the girls and the teachers; reminding her that this was the one opportunity that her "outside voice" could be put to good use and encouraging her to let them have fun within reason and to be a good counselor, not a stick in the mud! I think she will be a great counselor.

So as all the kids were filing onto the bus, I saw Kiki look up and spy my car still here. She rushed over. I thought to myself, "maybe she is coming back for one last hug, one more goodbye or tender word". She opened the door, leaned in and said "Mom, don't beat my WII Fit Scores."

It brought a tear to my eye.

Watch Out Dick Weber - I Am Going Pro!

When I was younger, I lived on a military base in an island in the Pacific. My Dad was stationed there for almost 4 years. Living on a military base is somewhat similar to living in a small town; there is a movie theater, a bowling alley, several swimming pools, places to have dinner, parks, a really good teen center, grocery stores etc. There was always some kind of organized activity at the teen center - a dance or roller skating in the rink behind the center. As most moms would, our mom, in what I suspect was really a self defense mechanism, tried to tire us out as much as possible by signing us up for different activities or sports. One of my sisters, Auntie M, was especially interested in sports. I know while we were there she tried a variety including basketball and bowling. I think a few of the other sisters, Auntie L & Auntie S, also got involved in the bowling. As usual Auntie M. was pretty darn good for an 8 year old and she took part in the junior bowling leagues offered at the base bowling alley. She became very focused on bowling, so much so that she even asked for a Dick Weber bowling glove for Christmas one year. Dick Weber was a famous bowler back in the day. You don't think they name a glove for just anyone do you? I can't remember if she ever got the glove. I am sure she will let me know.

Last Christmas our family got a Wii. For those of you who just crawled out of a cave, a Wii is a video game console. What makes it different from an x-box or a play station is the wireless controller that allows you to actually participate in some of the different game options available. All Wiis come with a sports playing game, in which you can play tennis, bowling, boxing, baseball and golf. In order to participate you create your own player. There are lots of different style options so you can have your player look as much or as little like you as you want. My player does look alot like me but if I had really been thinking I would have made her look a little more Jennifer Aniston and a little less Donny Osmond. As all kids are, mine are particularly good at video games. They especially enjoy the guitar game that I am fairly certain I am too old for. I just can't seem to get my fingers working in the right way. But I can do the sports one.

So recently I decided that I would try and master a few of the sports games so I am not a total pushover when I play Kiki & Snake. I started with the tennis game. I am horribly bad at it. The last game, I hit a spectator in the stands. In fact I am so bad that I haven't ever won a match. Time to move on. I tried boxing. I am getting fairly good at boxing. But in all honesty, my Donny-Osmond-look alike self has not had much in the way of competition. The computer assigns opponents to you. So far my boxing victories have been over 2 very slightly built Asian gentlemen, a rather frail looking guy with a goatee, and several bespectacled fellows. (I am not sure people wearing glasses are usually allowed to box, though). I also tried baseball and I am not very good. I am not sure that any amount of practice will help me get any better so unless I can get some of the juice from Barry or Derek Jeter, I am thinking baseball won't be my game. But I rock at bowling! Oh yeah! I have had several turkeys (3 strikes in a row). I don't know if that have a name for when you have 4 strikes in a row but I have done that a few times as well. I think I owe it all to my rather unique bowling delivery, I throw the ball up in the air so it bounces a little. Unorthodox maybe but I scored enough points to be in the "pro" category!!! How 'bout that Dick Weber? I am guessing he doesn't have much to say as he died in 2005. So I am going to try golf later this week. Be afraid Tiger Woods, be very afraid!!

Come On, California!!!

Okay, today I needed to call the DMV. Normally, I would rather do something fun like poke at my eyes with a toothpick but I needed some information that wasn't available on the website, so I had to call. After first advising me that all DMV offices are now closed on the first and third Fridays of everything month (thank you Ahhhnold) and then another recording to advise me that Saturday hours had been suspended (thank you California State Legislature), my "recording" advised me that "due to an increased number of calls your wait time MAY be longer than 10 minutes". 10 minutes is an incredibly long time to be on hold, even for the DMV and I didn't believe it. So I stayed on hold. and stayed. and stayed. and stayed.

This is a list of the tasks, I performed while being on hold:

1. I watched two segments of Martha Stewart cooking pork chops marinated in basalmic vinegar and preparing two pretty tasty vegetable sides that I think will be dinner tonight or tomorrow evening at the WTF household.

2. I ate lunch (a Lean Cuisine beef and portabello mushroom).

3. I finished my Starbucks Iced Tea.

4. I put in a load of laundry.

5. I folded another load out of the dryer.

6. I surveyed the creek in our back yard and wondered if it was going to overflow since it has been raining non-stop since about 9:30 a.m. today. (Most likely not, our local city works department is very wonderful about cleaning out the storm drain on a regular basis and it looks pretty good!)

7. I worried about whether the pool will over flow and should we use the sump pump tonight (and by me, I mean Chizz). Looks likely!

8. I looked for the sump pump in the garage. (Didn't find it,)

9. I reviewed the top stories in the morning newspaper. Attempted the Sudoku but got bored.

10. I put the newspaper in the recycling spot. (I am not going to finish that Sudoku!)


35 minutes, 44 seconds until Operator 2 came on the line and answered my question. All of which took about an additional 15 seconds. Great. Come on, California - this is no way to run a state.

To The Mailbox? Heck Yea!

So last night there was absolutely nothing on TV. In further evidence of that fact, I submit to you that Chizz & I watched "How I Met Your Mother" with Snake. Snake likes the show quite a bit. There are some cute moments, but I wouldn't set my DVR for it. However last night's episode was particularly relevant on several levels for our family.

The show centered on one of the characters who was out of work and apparently spent quite a bit of time looking for a job. As sometimes happens while participating in this kind of search, his self-confidence was taking a beating after so many rejections. The other characters commented on the fact that his "underpants radius" was becoming alarmingly large. The "underpants radius" is the radius you personally deem acceptable to walk around in your underwear. For this character, it started out just to the couch to watch television all day when he should have been job searching, then it grew to the front door to pick up the newspaper, then to the mailbox to pick up the mail and finally to a local fast food joint to eat a meal. (Yuck!) One night when they were all at their local watering hole hangout place, they decided to get burgers and the out of work character starts talking about the best burger he ever had in NY city. Apparently several years ago, when he was new to the city and didn't really know his way around he stumbled on a small hole in the wall place and had the best hamburger ever. Since that time, he has been searching for the hamburger place and has never been able to find it. The group decides they will go with him and try and find the place. They search high and low, and with Regis Philbin (because that always happens in NY) and finally they find the place and all is right with the world.

I have my own "hamburger" story. But it is not about hamburgers. And it doesn't take place in NY city. And Regis Philbin is nowhere in it. And it is not my story. But other than that it is EXACTLY the same. It is about chicken, German chicken. Hendl. Many, many, many, many years ago, Chizz went on a business trip to Germany with some work colleagues who also happened to be pretty good friends of his. As luck would have it, they went during Oktoberfest. They managed to go to quite a few tents and drink beer, eat, and have a great time. He came back and told me about this chicken, spit roasted, and it was the BEST chicken he had ever had in his entire life. He talked about that chicken for weeks. He STILL talks about that chicken. He dreamt about that chicken. So when we went back to Germany ourselves, several years later, he made me eat chicken at practically every meal, breakfast, lunch and dinner, in a search to find the elusive Oktoberfest Hendl. But it was not to be. And he has been back several times and still can't find the chicken. We have even searched for the German chicken in Belgium and Austria, but no luck. I suspect it is really not the chicken itself, but what it represented. Four young guys, no kids, in Germany drinking beer, eating chicken, freedom. Yes, symbolism because I am deep that way. (Shut up, I am too deep!)

This morning, Snake came out of his room wearing his t-shirt and boxers only, looking for a clean pair of jeans in the laundry room. I raised my eyebrows a little, because Snake very rarely wanders around in his boxers. His response? "My underpants radius is to the mailbox and back." Ha! I told him I doubt it. I mean, I love his skinny little white legs but he rarely goes around showing them off in private, let alone in public. He glared back at me, knowing I spoke the truth.

So, if you happened to be driving by our house this morning at about 7:13 a.m. that wasn't some kind of rare albino deer running across our driveway in dark blue striped boxers. That was my son, Snake. I am so proud.

What Am I Listening To?????

Every morning on the ride to their various schools, Kiki takes charge of the radio within 1.5 seconds of entering the car. She plays those radio controls with a precision not known to many heart surgeons. If she is in the back seat (because she was too slow to call "shotgun" compared to Snake who has been known to knock over people in his rush to be in sight of the car) she barks out instructions to her brother "Snake, push button 5 twice. No. Try 6. No, wait - button 3 two times". All to find the perfect song for the 5 minute ride to school. We can't take the chance that the day will be ruined by accidentally listening to NPR or Jimmy Buffet, for goodness sake. Chizz doesn't allow the kids to change his radio station settings, so he doesn't have this issue. But I usually don't mind it, I am able to block the "music" out (provided the volume is somewhat under ear breaking or car vibrating decibel range). I usually run through my daily itinerary in my mind, and it is all okay. I am so good at it, that sometimes, well after I have dropped the kids off , when I get about a block from my house (like today), I realize I have been listening to Will.I.Am or Rhianna or Let it Rock by Kevin Rudolf for the past mile. Then I get embarrassed for some reason. Like I have been caught. But here is my confession, I kind of like "Let it Rock". It is irritatingly catchy (the chorus part, not the rap part). Try it and see if it doesn't follow you all day. At least in the privacy of your own home or garage or ipod.


Let It Rock - Kevin Rudolf

It Was Brung!!

On Saturday, Chizz and I spent the morning at a cheerleading competition. Now it's not what you're thinking. Unless you're thinking that our appearance at the cheerleading event was the culmination of a long night of red wine at a Christmas party when going to a cheerleading competition sounded like a GREAT idea. If so, then it is EXACTLY what you're thinking.

But seriously, some of our very good friends have a daughter who is an excellent cheerleader and happened to mention to Chizz that they would be in our neck of the woods in January for said competition and Chizz said "Sure, we would LOVE to go" (remember the red wine!). Now, Jeanne, being the good friend she is and of course remembering the red wine, gave us, not 1, not 2 but 3 chances to gracefully exit. But Chizz and I not ever accused of being graceful and knowing that our kids would not be awake until after we came home from the event and actually, not so secretly, kind of intrigued by a cheerleading competition, decided to go anyway.

I was amazed at what a huge deal this is. We showed up at the very large high school where the competition was being held and every parking space was taken up. Chizz and I have gone to many different kids sporting events over the years and we found cheerleading is very similar to our experience with swim team. Parents spend all day waiting for their kids to do about one minute of some activity and then it is over. There were the obligatory food tents and tables, the different vendors selling "cheer wear", t-shirts, ribbons, uniforms, etc. Some of the teams were huge, you just saw masses of color, red, blue, gold, walking by. The girls all had almost the exact same hairstyle, pulled off the face, very tight and topped by an elaborate ribbon of the team colors. I saw no bangs, no short cuts, all the girls seemed to have long hair. We heard that some of the teams still do the elaborate curly ponytails and buns, like you see in the movies, but I don't think I saw more than 1 team that had that look. Most of the cheerleaders were wearing sweats before their routines, carrying backpacks or athletic bags with the accoutrement necessary for the days events.

We arrived pretty early so we got the chance to watch a few teams before K's team competed. It was really interesting, in a sociological way. For the most part the teams competed one right after another. There were quite a few teams, I think we saw somewhere in the neighborhood of 10-15 groups. Sometimes there were little gaps between the groups, were music was played. I spent a good deal of time watching the cheerleaders that were waiting. In between routines, they chit-chatted, touched up their makeup, texted, practiced looking bored and all of the other things teenagers do when they are bored or want to give the appearance of being bored. But the minute a competitor stepped on the mat, these girls were in rapt attention. Did this group execute a move as well as they do? Was their throw higher? Absorbing every movement the other groups made, evaluating, critiquing, mocking (after all they are teenage girls). K's group did very well. I didn't see one mistake, although they were quick to criticize themselves. K is the "flyer" of the group; she is basically, lifted, thrown and balanced places that humans don't normally go. Some of these routines are fairly complex and they don't always go to plan. We saw several injuries happen right on the floor when a girl landed the "wrong" way. A couple of competitors limped right off the floor. I read somewhere that cheerleading is the number 1 sport for injuries in high school. Seeing some of the difficult moves these kids do, it is a wonder that more of them aren't hurt. This is not all about the poms-poms and looking pretty. These girls (and boys) are very athletic. There is an element of grace about it as well, the routines often include some dancing. I noticed that when a squad does include a boy, he is usually crouching in the back during the dance part. It is like he is not expected to move in the same manner as the girls. I guess he is just there for his muscle!

So we left shortly after the awards ceremony, where there was lots of squealing and jumping up and down. And that was just Chizz. C'mon . . . . You knew I was going to do that! K's group got a ribbon and won a chance to go to Nationals in Florida. But they had already qualified before so it wasn't a huge surprise. I can't even imagine what a big deal that is, hundreds of teams, hundreds of parents wearing their "Cheer Mom" or "Cheer Dad" t-shirts, the anxiety level must be huge. I just hope that Jeanne doesn't ply Chizz with gallons of red wine at the Superbowl party or we will be Orlando bound! (I wonder if they have "Cheer Good Friends" tshirts?)