Guess What Came Out of My Chimney Today? Not Santa!

‘Twas the day after the kids left on school trips
And all through the flat
I could hear the sounds of drilling
Caused by a man in a hard hat.

The headache I have, I've had since yesterday
That's when the drilling began much to my dismay.
I had hoped maybe today they would start something new
But I could tell by 8:00 a.m. that would not be true.

When at 10:00 a.m., there arose such a clatter,
I ran to my chimney to see what was the matter.
When what to my wondering eyes do I see?
Bricks, dust and soot! All kinds of debris!



I went to the remodel next door to find the man in charge,
I took him back to my flat to show him the chimney discharge.
He hummed, and he hawed, he was really quite surprised.
The drilling caused the problem, he swiftly surmised.



He promised to have it cleaned, lickety-split
Someone would come with a vacuum, a whole cleaning kit.
A young Polish guy named Jozef was soon to arrive
But unfortunately my carpet could not be revived.



I took photos for the blog and some to reassure us.
But I know the truth is bound to slowly unfurl
You can take the girl out of insurance
But you can’t take insurance out of the girl

The landlord will be here at three to see the muss,
It is sure that he will be raising quite the fuss
A nice guy to us but to others quite firm
I know that foreman is likely to squirm



If things don’t go his way, I fear
There will only be one call we are likely to hear
Come Jacoby, Come Meyers, Come Solicitor, Come Attorney
If these people don’t pay, we'll take them on a legal journey

But none of that matters to me, I will shrug,
I just want someone to take the soot out of my rug.
And while they are at it, I have a brillant idea,
Take a look at my ex-white sofa from the store called Ikea.

So I will proclaim as they argue and fight,
"All I want is my carpet cleaned
and my sofa returned white!"**





**With sincere apologies to Clement Clarke Moore