Boy Communication vs. Girl Communication

When Kiki left for college, I wasn't worried that I wouldn't hear from her. She is my communicative child. All throughout high school, Kiki always kept in touch. Whether it was a call at break time or lunch to remind me to do something or a furtive text from class to let me know a great grade on a paper or test score. She has always kept in touch. It has been the same way since she has gone to college. She routinely calls me when walking to class to let me know what is going on in her life or to catch up on hometown gossip. She still texts to let me know a great grade or to see if I remembered to make a tuition or housing payment. I am pretty much in constant contact with her.

I always said that it would be different when Snake goes to college. His communication genes come from Chizz's side of the family tree. While as Kiki texts or calls me almost on a daily basis, I know that my contact will be quite different with Snake. I will most like drop him off at college in September and I won't hear from him again until the day before Thanksgiving when he checks in to find out his travel arrangements to come home for the holiday.

So why am I surprised at his lack of communication on his trip to Peru? Perhaps I thought the international nature of his trip would prompt some desire on his part to keep in touch or he would just be homesick. So far the communication has been minimal to say the least. He has been gone a week. I have heard from him directly twice, maybe three times. I say maybe because I am not certain about one time. It is not that I expect to him to be in daily contact with us but since there have been some developments in that part of the world, I have been wishing there was a bit more contact.

Or maybe it is because the quality of his communications have been less than satisfactory. The communications so far have been brief. His first email was about 4 lines. One line to tell me he was having difficulty texting on his phone. But not to worry as he can get internet on his Ipod through the hotel. He asked me to respond to let him know that I got his message and oh, by the way, he was doing great in Peru. I responded back with about 6 paragraphs, describing completely what he needed to do to send a text internationally, advising him of our travel plans in detail, what was going on here, reminding him to take photos, asking what he had done so far, advising him that I had followed the 5 paragraphs of instructions he left me on getting concert tickets for a concert that went on sale last week and that I was successful in getting a difficult ticket, inquiring about the weather and wishing him a great time on his trip. He responded with 4 lines (again) thanking me for getting the ticket, indicating that it wasn't a dialing problem with the texting - he just wasn't getting service, wishing me a great time on our trip and that he was, indeed, having fun so far but he was getting very little sleep. I sent him back a 4 paragraph email, detailing the results of my 45 minute communique with ATT about his difficulties in texting internationally and what he needed to do now, reminding him of the exorbitant costs of telephone calls and the prohibitive costs of data downloads or internet d downloads from his phone and reminding him not to do any of that under ANY circumstances, reminding him to try and get a good nights sleep when he can and to take photos. His 2 line response the next day was to advise me that Iron Maiden was set to make a big concert tour announcement on Thursday and I needed to stand by in case he needed to get tickets for whatever concert they were about to announce. And he was doing great in Peru.

That last communication was about 6 hours before the 8.8 earthquake in Chile, the country right next door to Peru. So I waited, and waited, and waited. Thinking any moment he would email or text me to let me know that although he had felt the earthquake, things were status quo in Peru. Nothing. And more Nothing. So I send him an email, asking him if he had heard about the earthquake and perhaps it might be nice to let his poor old mom & dad know that he was "doing great in Peru". Nothing.

Until this morning, when I got a text from an unfamiliar cell phone number in our local area code. It said "Snake is doing well and sends his love." Hmmmmmm. The second part so doesn't sound like Snake, but in a way the message is all Snake. It is all about him reading my email after the earthquake, and thinking he has to communicate with me but forgot to charge his phone and doesn't have internet service to communicate. Soooooo he talks his friend at 925xxxxxxx into sending me a quick text to let me know he is fine, the "sending his love" is the editorializing of another 16 year old boy. You just need to read between the lines (or the words if there are hardly any lines).

Gosh, I can't wait for college. I just hope I hear from him before graduation.

Metal Mom

I am fairly certain I was the oldest person waiting this morning for the Ticketmaster clock to strike 10:00 a.m. for a particular show. That was the magic hour for the Mastodon concert tickets to go on pre-sale. Since Snake was a bit uncertain as to what his internet capabilities would be in Peru, he buttered me up for several days so that I might do exactly what I did. Waiting for the clock to tick down so I could snag a high coveted General Admission, Floor, Standing Room ticket??? What? He doesn't even want to sit down and enjoy the melodic sounds of "Aqua Dementia" or "Blood and Thunder" waft over him? Nooooooooooo! It is way more fun to be on the floor and thrash around and be involved in the music. Snake loves getting as close to the bands as he can. That way he can snag a drum stick or set list when the band throws them into the crowd.

My mom used to do something similar for us when we were growing up. She would call up radio stations while we were at school and try to win tickets or free albums for us for whatever group was coming to town next - Loverboy, Heart, Debbie Gibson. The worst was when she won, she would have to go on the air with the DJ and say something like "96.1 plays the coolest music" or scream like she was 15 years old. But she would do it. All for the free stuff.

So Snake will see Mastodon in the Spring. Perhaps while he is at the concert, I will sit back and listen to my favorite Mastodon song "Cut you with a Linoleum Knife", their thinly disguised rant against people who talk during movies. Just trying to make the world better, one song at a time.

Faux Empty Nest

So Snake left this week to go to Peru on a school trip. His school is on the trimester system, where the school year is divided into 3 sections as opposed to 4 quarters/2 semesters as most schools seem to be. The problem is that the school year doesn't divide evenly into 3; there are a few leftover weeks. So Snake's school devised what they call "mini term". Mini term is two weeks of 2 classes per day that are sort of fun but have some educational component to them. The teachers get to teach classes in areas they might have a particular interest in or passion. For example, last year Snake took Archery and "Snap, Crackle, Pop - Your Brain on Drugs", a science course on what physically happens to your body when you take drugs. There was a history/cooking class that followed the Spice Trade in Asia and why that was both historically and culinarily important. There was a course on hiking the many trails in our area, a photography course, usually a few sports oriented courses etc. In addition, usually a trip or two that kids can sign up for (for an additional fee, of course)that have a community service component to them. Last year for example, the kids went to Louisiana and worked with Habitat for Humanity and helped rebuild an area still devastated by Hurricane Katrina.

This year the trip is to Peru. They had an overwhelming response but could only take so many students. The administration wanted to leave it open for a wide variety of students, so each student had to fill out a questionnaire and write a short essay about why they would be a perfect student to take on this trip. Snake pointed out that in addition to speaking Spanish fairly well, he was a well-seasoned traveller thanks to our short overseas assignment. He included anecdote about being held at immigration when he was travelling between London and US by himself. (Apparently, being an adult as far as flying alone on the airlines is not the same as going through immigration as an adult. A minor, under 16, must have someone waiting for them on the other side before they can be released.) Snake wrote about the incident as an example as to why you have to be flexible when you travel. Things happen and you have to learn how to roll with the punches, especially when you travel. He thinks, and I believe he is correct, that the essay was a good portion of why he was chosen.

There has only been one potential disappointment. Several weeks before the scheduled departure, there was a horrible mudslide/flood at Machu Picchu, the pre-Colombian Inca city. The roads and more importantly, the railroad tracks have been flooded and are inoperable. The Peruvian officials have no idea how long it is going to take to clear the site, although they are motivated as this is the number tourist attraction in Peru. So for now, they don't think they are going to be able to go, which is a shame. However, the chaperones are keeping an open mind and if by some miracle it opens while the group is there, they will try and get there.

The rest of the trip will include both hotel stays and stays with local families. The students will take language classes as well as classes in salsa, cooking and ceramics. They will work with younger children in preschools helping them learn a little English. They will also get to sight see and try a few Peruvian delicacies. I think it will be a fantastic experience.

Oh, and just in case you are worried about what Chizz and I doing while our nest is empty. Don't. We are going south, baby. To Carmel. Where we plan on not helping any children in pre-school, hanging out at restaruants, doing some, ok ALOT, wine tasting, taking some driving tours, going to a movie or two.

I think it will be a fantastic experience.