Facebook

Chizz and I don't have facebooks for several reasons. For Chizz, it is because he has a hard time figuring out how to make sure his work life and his personal life don't intersect. He has a "phoney baloney job" gentlemen and they probably wouldn't understand things like rolling shopping carts off dorm buildings (allegedly), setting palapas on fire (accidentally - allegedly) and hitting Japanese employees of the Korean embassy with errant golf balls (truthfully). It's just best left unsaid.

Me? The reason I don't have one is that I don't want the embarrassment of my kids rejecting my friend request. Also, I think my kids have reached the age where, much to my dismay, they deserve a bit of privacy. C'mon think about it, as a young adult would you have wanted your mom knowing everything you did every moment of the day or, more importantly, every moment of every evening? Noooooooo! But in this digital age, we have the capability to do just that. Our kids have to learn what to put on line and when. If they don't it can have disastrous results - loss of potential jobs, loss of friends, damage to your reputation. I encourage my kids to think carefully about what they put online and save a few exceptions, I think they have been pretty good.

That is why I support applications such as this one. It helps kids make the appropriate choices online.

Hey! Wait a minute. . . . .

Turkeys in My Own Back Yard

No, not the ones in the California Senate who can't pass a budget in time for the second year in a row. (By the by, c'mon guys and gals!!) Real turkeys. Wild ones. I was sitting talking with Snake in the family room (probably one of our deep philosophical discussion on the current problems of the day or football) when I noticed a turkey on our back lawn. Then another, then another. Wild turkeys are not totally unheard of in our area, but they are usually found in the parks or more remote areas. So I took a photo of the 5 or so that made it to our lawn.

When I was outside, I could hear quite a bit of noise. Who knew turkeys were so loud? I went the front and there were probably 30 turkeys total in the front of our house. I have to admit, these turkeys are pretty ugly. Definitely not meal material. The strange thing is that the turkeys have now made an appearance two weeks in a row - both times on a Thursday. Is this some kind of strange deep set existentialist "anti-turkey" pre-Thanksgiving message? Are the turkeys of the world (or the turkeys of Northern California) trying to tell me something? We will see how long this trend continues. And if one of these turkeys shows up with Michael Moore or some kind of a protest sign, we may be having Vegetarian Thanksgiving this November!

Like Mother, Like Daughter

When I was in high school (many, many moons ago), I lived on Okinawa. Our father was in the US Air Force and we were stationed there for a bit over three years. It was different living on a military base on a small foreign island about 6o miles long and about 2 miles wide at it widest point. As children, some of the differences were especially annoying. One particular example that comes to mind was television. We received our television from Armed Forces Radio and Television. At that time, it was the only English language station in the area and it was only on about 10 hours a day, mostly when we were at school. So we didn't get to see much tv when we were there and what we did see was a bit dated.

Another unusual thing to deal were typhoons. A typhoon is a tropical storm or cyclone in the northeastern section of the Pacific Ocean. When we had a typhoon warning, depending on the level or severity of the storm we would have several courses of action. If it was a low level storm, we would just be warned about heavy rains and winds. But as the severity level of the storm increased, the restrictions became more limiting. At a certain level, they really encouraged all personnel to stay indoors unless absolutely necessary. So to make staying indoors more palatable, whenever a typhoon rating got above a certain level, they would keep television on for 24 hours. In addition, they stockpiled better programming to show only when there was a typhoon. For example, they might have Sound of Music or something similar playing. Kids always looked forward to typhoons just as kids in Maine would look forward to a snow day.

One year we were very excited because there was a typhoon rating and the Wizard of Oz was going to be on. All 5 of us were looking forward to it. Mom had made a HUGE bowl of popcorn and we were just settling down to watch. All of the sudden, Auntie K, who was about 4 at the time, announced that she had stuck a popcorn kernel in her nose. No amount of blowing could dislodge it. So Mom announced she would have to take her to the emergency room AND (cue dramatic music here) we would all have to go with her. I think my dad was working at the time and mom felt she couldn't leave the 4 of us alone during a typhoon. So we all had to go to the clinic with them and miss Wizard of Oz. Oh, the unfairness of it all. We never let Auntie K. forget that and it still comes up occasionally in family discussions. (Remember that time more than 30 years ago, when we couldn't watch Wizard of Oz because of your and your popcorn kernel?) Truthfully - it still stings.

Scan forward 35 years. Yesterday, Snake picked up Zabba from preschool. It is very convenient having children with driver's licenses now. When he came home, he mentioned to me that the teacher said Zabba may or may not have a perler bead stuck up her nose!!! Apparently a friend told the teacher she had done this but since 4 year olds are not particularly good with detail, the teachers were a bit skeptical and they couldn't see one. So I had Zabba blow really hard and then lie down on the bed. Sure enough, there was a perler bead up there. I felt I could get it with my tweezers but on my first attempt, I pinched Zabba and she was pretty reluctant to have me stick anything else up her nose. So we had to go to the pediatrician's office. They took it in stride; apparently retrieving foreign objects from noses or ears is a weekly occurrence and they have all kinds of instruments for this purpose. It took all of a minute.

Auntie L, Auntie M & Auntie S will be glad to know that I let everyone at the doctor's office from nurses to doctors to medical assistants (the janitor didn't seem very interested) know the popcorn kernel story and how this proclivity is genetic. Revenge is a dish apparently best served ice cold!!!!! (Cue evil laughter here.)

California Busy Work

Did you catch Face the Nation Sunday Morning? There was a segment with David Boies, the attorney for the plaintiff and Tony Perkins, President of the Family Research Council. I couldn't remember exactly where I had heard about the Family Research Council but I did a bit of research and remembered. I will let you do your own research but let's just say, their organization was in the news recently when one of their founding members (whom they have since distanced themselves from in a BIG way) was caught apparently practicing what he most clearly does not preach.

As I was listening to these two men debate the recent Prop 8 ruling in California, it occurred to me that we are spending so much time doing this in our state when we have such HUGE problems in so many areas. Especially when I know that eventually we will get there, there being equality for ALL people, regardless of their gender, race, sexual orientation. We will get there. I was just hoping for sooner rather than later. I don't really want to get into the merits of each side, although. . . . Okay, just one small point. When Boies was pointing out that it is one to thing to pontificate on the television talk show circuit about "surveys", and "research" and "studies" done on the negative and harmful effect of gay marriage on children but when you get into a court of law, you need to prove that there are such studies and surveys and research done by accredited institutions. And there were none. None. Tony Perkins countered with that because this was a "new" area there had not been enough time to do credible studies or research on this issue. But he had loads of statistics that indicate the harm caused to children by being raised in single family homes or homes that were broken by divorce. Wait a minute!!! Is he quoting statistics of the harm done to children by the effects of heterosexual relationships that have splintered to prove his point that gay marriage would be harmful to children? What??? Actually he was. His point being the the breakdown of marriage started with the "no-fault" divorce laws. Wow!! Well, why don't we work on that? Instead of denying rights to a particular group who have never had the right to marry before, why don't we work on the making it more difficult for the people who get married to get divorced or make it more difficult to get married in the first place. Hmmmm. Wonder what kind of effect that would have on children? Wonder what effect that would have on prominent conservatives who have divorced, some - many, many times? What do you think Newt Gingrich? John McCain? Do you think it should be more difficult to get divorced, Rush Limbaugh, Mr. "I am on my 4th wife"? Boies also pointed out that there are studies on the effect of gay marriage on children. The studies are just not in the United States (understandably since most states preclude them) but from many countries in Europe where gay marriage has been allowed. And guess what they show? Nothing. Really. That there is really no difference to a child if a marriage breaks two gay parents or two heterosexual parents. It is hard either way. No surprise.

But I digress again, as usual. My main point was to be that the citizens of California need to really, really look around. Is this the biggest crisis facing our state? Really? Because I have found a few other things that I think we need to look at. In no particular order:


1. California is either 23rd or 44th in the nation in per pupil spending. The Census Bureau recently released ranking based on the 2007/2008 school year which found that California is 23rd in the nation. For some reason it takes over 2 years for the government to evaluate the data they receive. The NEA, which is the largest public school union in the US, found for the same time period California ranked 26th. However, the NEA just recently released its data for 2008/2009 year (apparently doesn't take them 2 years to process) which found that California plummeted to 44th place. Since historically the NEA and Census Bureau rankings have usually tracked within a few places of each other, we can expect that even in the Census Bureau ranking, California will be somewhere near 4oth place. If you have kids in public schools, you know that this is true. Parents are spending more and more out of their own pockets for school supplies, books, transportation. Costs that used to be part of the school's budgets are now routinely being passed on to the parents.

2. California is #2 on the states with the highest cost of living. (Hawaii is #1).

3. California is #3 on both highest cost of housing and highest cost of food.

4. California is #1 on highest teachers salaries. I know some people will say that is the reason that we rank so low in per pupil spending but I am not so sure. Don't we have to pay our teachers enough to eat, pay rent and pay the gas bill (see items 2 & 3)? I think it is too simplistic to say there is one root cause for all of this but at the same time, I suspect the teachers' union has done more harm then good in recent years. I know at one of the districts in our area, the teachers union and the district have come to an impasse over the district's request that the teachers pay a portion of their health care costs. Currently teachers don't pay for their health benefits at all. It doesn't seem to much to ask in this economy. I don't know anyone who doesn't pay something for their health care.

5. California has the 3rd highest unemployment rate at 12.3%. We are behind Michigan (#2, 13.2%) and Nevada (#1, 14.2%)

6. California ranks 4th in the nation in the number of foreclosures. 1 out of every 194 homes in our state is somewhere in the process of foreclosure. Wow!!

7. 21% of California residents have no health insurance, the 4th highest rate in the country.

8. We are ranked 37th out of 51 in high school graduation percentage. Only 68% of our students graduate. Arkansas, West Virginia, Michigan, Kentucky all outrank us. Kick our butt.
Shame.


So let me ask you Californians, is preventing gay marriage really more important than any of the things on this list?

People Smarter than Me Said It

So I have spent the better part of a day trying to come up with something profound, wise or witty about the ruling in California yesterday overturning Proposition 8. I think my position on the issue is clear. In reality, hasn't it all been said? So in that vein, I went looking for quotes that spoke to the issue or issues brought up in the debate. Some surprising quotes from some surprising sources.

Majority Rules:

All, too, will bear in mind this sacred principle, that though the will of the majority is in all cases to prevail, that will to be rightful must be reasonable; that the minority possess their equal rights, which equal law must protect, and to violate would be oppression. Thomas Jefferson

Individual rights are not subject to a public vote; a majority has no right to vote away the rights of a minority; the political function of rights is precisely to protect minorities from oppression by majorities (and the smallest minority on earth is the individual).
Ayn Rand

The truth does not require a majority to prevail, ladies and gentlemen. The truth is its own power. The truth will out. Never forget that.
Rush Limbaugh

Does Equality really mean Equality for Everyone?

An equal application of law to every condition of man is fundamental. Thomas Jefferson

A people who extend civil liberties only to preferred groups start down the path either to dictatorship of the right or the left. Justice William O. Douglas

Gay Partners already get "similar" benefits through employment so it is not necessary to get married.

I am not interested in picking up crumbs of compassion thrown from the table of someone who considers himself my master. I want the full menu of rights. Bishop Desmond Tutu

Name Calling & the Smear Campaign

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. Oscar Wilde

Facts are meaningless. You can use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true. Homer Simpson

If we love our country, we should also love our countrymen. Ronald Reagan.

D'oh!!!!!!

Again?????

Yesterday morning, I went out to the backyard to water some of the flower pots, it was promising to be a hot one. Something caught my eye in the pool area. This:




Another duck mom and babies. This time 8. I am not a duck expert but I am fairly certain this is not the same mom as 6 weeks prior. Last week Chizz & I were having a drink out in the backyard when a female duck landed in our pool. She was there for a little while when she went up into the bushes (where we think the ducks having been making their nests) and disappeared. Then this week, viola!!

I think it is kind of cool that no matter what we think we know, mother nature throws a wrench in things every now and then. This year there has been a lot of discussion in our neck of the woods about what a strange weather year it has been. For the most part we have had a cooler than usual summer weather. In fact the National Weather Service says it is the coolest summer in our area in 40 years. Wow! We just returned from the East Coast last week where they are going through a bit of a heat wave lately, and let me tell you - it was plenty hot. 85 degrees at night for dinner. It just goes to show that you can't control everything. Somethings just happen.

I am thinking the duck maternity ward is closed now. The mom hung around overnight, after tucking her brood under her wings for the night. She left sometime this morning after 9 or so. It was cool having them around but I am thinking we are done. Maybe. . . . .

Why I Love Our Friends. . . .

We had an absolutely wonderful 4th of July weekend with some of our friends at Lake Tahoe. As our lives seem to get busier with volleyball matches, school, college searches, jobs, it is harder and harder to connect on a regular basis or as often as we would like. This weekend the stars aligned. And perhaps because we can't do it regularly enough, we seem to appreciate and enjoy the times we do spend together much more. The group is comfortable enough together to spend entire evenings together or to split up in various combos. Want to hike? Sure, at least 2 or 3 others in the group will join you. How about a trip to the beach? Off go 4. Shopping? 3 girls and 2 credit cards (otherwise known as Moms) will do that. Various combinations of kids, parents, some related, some not. It is comfortable and fun.

About 2 weeks ago, I mentioned I was making a cork wreath from wine corks I had collected over the past few months. It is pretty big and I miscalculated the number of corks I needed. So far at least 300 corks have gone into it and I had just about run out. So I just mentioned to a few people I needed more corks. This is what my cork jar looked like before last weekend (on Thursday):

This is what it looked like today, after I included the corks from the weekend and some brought by our friends:

And that is what I love about our friends. No, not that they drink a lot of wine (although that might be one of the reasons). You can count on them. Whether it is to bring you corks to finish a a project or to take your kids to the beach when you might not want to go or to provide a bed when you are on your way to the airport or to give you a hand to hold when you literally need one to go forward or to listen to your work problems or to go on a hike with when no one else in your family will or to give you aloe when you are sunburned or to share a favorite new wine store or cook a fabulous dinner while you sit around and enjoy nature. Thanks guys! XOXOXO